Flatulence and exercise

Every hour of everyday I have the most random thoughts pass through this brain of mine and sometimes I wonder if anyone else thinks the same thing.  With this new fitness kick I'm on there are several times the word, or feeling, flatulence comes along.
 
Here's the scenario....I start out for my cardio on the treadmill.  I prefer something similar to what they call HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) cardio.  I begin with a 5 minute brisk walk.  Then I jog for a couple of minutes, sprint for 30 seconds, then back down for a few minutes of brisk walking again and continue repeating this cycle until I die, or 30-45 minutes...whatever comes first.  What I don't understand is why, 7 minutes into this rhythm, do I suddenly feel the need to fart!  Seriously, all day I could have had gas, but no, let's do it while I'm running next to a skinny bitch at the crowded gym!  I bet she doesn't fart, her butt probably whispers!

One day I would like to video myself on the treadmill just to see what I look like and see if I can pick out the moment I am holding in with all my might a fart!  In my head I think I must look ridiculous!  It always seems like I'm in a good rhythm, feeling good, then suddenly I jog with a limp because my butt muscles are squeezed so tight I can't possibly have a normal stride.  I just wish this did not happen. 

Now, I've had enough anatomy, physiology and biology courses to know this is a normal human function/reaction.  Your body is moving with intensity and exercise is aiding/speeding up the digestive process so any gas in the body is moving quicker through the system.  I've read things that say don't eat before running, and I don't.  Typically I exercise 4-5 hours post meal, so seriously why the farts?  I know I'm not the only one who deals with this, believe me...I've smelt your ass at the gym...and no it wasn't me that time.  Maybe someone needs to invent the exercise butt plug. However, that too could make me run funny.

One last fart thought that I need to put out there. 
If you can see your breath in the cold can you see your fart in the cold? 
Seriously, just one of the many thoughts that runs through my brain!